Grace

"Ah, my Brothers and Sisters, Christ's eyes look in the opposite direction to ours. We usually look for some goodness on the part of men before we help them, but He looks to their sin, degradation and need. He is kind to the unthankful and the evil. He justifies those who are not, in themselves, just -- while we were dead in trespasses and sins, 'in due time Christ died for the ungodly.' Grace, pure Grace, abounds in Him and is blessedly manifested in His mission of saving the lost."

~ Charles Spurgeon


I find it profoundly interesting that Jesus' mission to rescue sinners was not motivated by something "worthy" or "valuable" in us, but rather his mercy is magnified by the fact that He saved us even while we had nothing to offer Him but our sin and shame. To think that Jesus didn't come to rescue friends, but to love his enemies, serve them unto death, adopt them as His children, and allow them to rein with Him forever... God's grace is amazing!
~ Kirk

From This Point Forward

“Just get over it.”

(“Easier said than done.”)

by David Jeremiah

It was like a scene from a science fiction movie. Fifty-seven tornados ripped across the South in one day, plowing through towns like bulldozers, blowing houses apart like matchboxes, flattening buildings, and ruining lives. The town of Enterprise, Alabama, was especially hard hit. At one o’clock in the afternoon, a tornado developed near the municipal airport, lifted off the ground, and headed straight for the town’s high school. In the ensuing chaos, the bodies of eight students were pulled from the wreckage. Today these young people are remembered simply as “The 8.”
A recent article in The Dothan Eagle reported that though the rubble is gone and school schedules have returned to normal, the families of “The 8” are still having a hard time. Healing is slow in coming, and the hurts are as fresh today as they were a year ago. Sometimes the comments of friends don’t help; and according to the heartbroken families, one statement is particularly insensitive: “You just have to get over it. You just have to move on.”
“They don’t understand,” said Kathy Strunk, whose daughter Katie perished in the tornado. “They don’t understand that although we can heal, we’re never going to forget, and we’re never really going to move on.”
Families of “The 8” meet regularly to talk about their children and to support each other. “I look forward to our meetings together,” said one parent, whose son, Ryan, was lost in the tornado. “When I’m feeling something and I just mention it, they’re feeling the same way. It’s good for me to know I’m not the only one. I’m not going crazy like I think I am sometimes.” 1
The story of this tragedy should teach several lessons to all of us: (1) Adversity can come into our lives at any time; it can literally blow in from the sky. (2) Healing isn’t always easy. (3) Words can be harmful as well as helpful. (4) “Getting over it” is easier said than done. (5) The best comforters are fellow sufferers who can empathize with us and share sympathizing tears.
A Lot to Get Over
There’s a lot to “get over” in life. On earth we’re surrounded by adversity and suffering, and the pain can sometimes be greater than we feel we can bear. I once confessed in a sermon that one of the most difficult subjects for me to talk about is the topic of suffering. I don’t like to discuss it. I don’t like to read about it. I don’t like to investigate it. I wish we could all avoid it; but adversity is inevitable for everyone on earth, and the Bible says we should not think it strange when it happens to us.
Even something as wonderful as falling in love can—often does—lead to suffering. Neil Gaiman, who wrote the script for the recent movie Beowulf, had something to say about this: “Have you ever been in love?” he asked. “Horrible isn’t it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build up a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life . . . You give them a piece of you. They didn’t ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn’t your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you up and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like ‘maybe we should be just friends’ turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It’s a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love.” 2
That’s why you’ll sometimes hear a girl saying, “I’ve finally gotten over him,” or a guy say, “I just can’t get over her.”
It’s hard to move on.
On one level, of course, we do have to try to eventually get over things and “accept the things we cannot change.” The Swiss doctor Elizabeth Kübler-Ross once explained that in the face of loss or heartache, our emotions go through a “grief cycle,” which might include shock, denial, bargaining, anger, depression, and eventual acceptance and adjustment. The problem comes when we get “stuck” in that cycle. When someone tells us to “get over it,” they’re probably trying to nudge us on to a healthier stage of life.
In the Bible, for example, we read about the prophet Samuel who had chosen and mentored King Saul. When Saul fell into sin, Samuel was devastated. In 1 Samuel 16:1, the Lord asked him, “How long will you mourn for Saul, seeing I have rejected him from reigning over Israel? Fill your horn with oil, and go; I am sending you to Jesse the Bethlehemite. For I have provided Myself a king among his sons.”
It wasn’t easy, but Samuel obeyed.
Yet we have to remember that the deeper the wound, the longer the recovery. If I stub my toe, it takes a few minutes for the pain to subside. If I fall off a ladder and break my arm, the time is extended. But if I have a car wreck with major injuries, it’ll take weeks, months, or even years to recover.
The same is true for the soul. The deeper the hurt, the longer the healing.
Reckless Words / Healing Words
Sometimes I’ve watched someone who has lived in depression for years, and I’ve wanted to say, “You know, at some point you have to give this to the Lord, cast your burden onto His back, and remember that He intends for us to live a life of joy and victory. Come on, turn the corner, get over it, soldier on!”
But sometimes the pain just doesn’t seem to end, the tears don’t stop, the illness doesn’t subside, and the wounds just seem to get deeper; and we need to pray for wisdom to say the right words to those going through such times. Remember Proverbs 12:18. “Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing” (NIV).
When a friend needs encouragement, learn to deliberately consult the Lord before opening your mouth. “Dear Lord,” you might pray, “You’ve said in Proverbs 16:24 that pleasant words are like honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones. Please help me to speak words that are healing, helpful, and holy to this one I love.”
Then as you weep with those who weep and strengthen those who are weary, speak the words God gives and remember to prayerfully point them toward Christ, the Man of Sorrows.
Holocaust survivor Elie Wiesel tells of being singled out for punishment one day in the Nazi death camp. He was a teenager at the time, and he’d inadvertently stumbled onto an officer taking advantage of a woman in a back room of a warehouse. Shortly thereafter, the officer, enraged at being caught, assembled the prisoners, including Wiesel and his father; and a wave of dread swept over the group.
“An ordinary inmate does not have the right to mix into other people’s affairs,” barked the officer. “One of you does not seem to have understood this point. I shall therefore try to make him understand clearly, once and for all.”
Wiesel felt sweat running down his back as his number was called. As he stepped forward, a crate was pulled into place and the boy was ordered to lie across it to be whipped. The pain was indescribable, and the beating left him barely conscious. But Wiesel later said that one person suffered more than he did—his father, standing among the prisoners, helplessly watching, unable to do anything to save or spare his son. 3
When you think you can’t get over some deep hurt or loss, remember how the Father of Glory stood silently by as His Son suffered scourging and crucifixion, that by His stripes we can be healed. If you can’t move on, take hold of His nail-scarred hands and let Him help you. “How sweet the name of Jesus sounds in a believer’s ear,” wrote John Newton, “It soothes his sorrows, heals his wounds, and drives away his fear.”
Only Jesus can heal our deepest hurts, and He can help you and me. He’s the Great Physician. Move on over to Him.
1 “Families of ‘The 8’ Heal through Monthly Meetings,” by Lance Griffin, in The Dothan Eagle, March 1, 2008, at http://www.dothaneagle.com/gulfcoasteast/dea/local_news.apx.-content-articles-DEA-2008-03-01-0004.html, accessed on March 19, 2008.

2 http://thinkexist.com/quotes/neil_gaiman/

3 Elie Wiesel, Night (New York: Hill and Wang, 2006), 57-58.