Build up (Words)

Paul says, “Let your speech always be with grace, seasoned with salt, that you may know how you ought to answer each one” (Col. 4:6)...The Apostle Paul had much more in mind than curse words when he said, “Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification, according to the need of the moment, that it may give grace to those who hear” (Eph. 4:29). “Paul is talking about words that tear people apart. Such speech consists of unkind words, words that cause and complicate problems rather than solve problems. These are words that cut and slice, the kinds of words that were natural to the former manner of life.... Instead of using unwholesome, rotten, cutting words, a Christian must speak words that ‘edify’ (build up). They should be constructive rather than destructive words; they should build up instead of tear down.... Wholesome words are those which are directed toward the problem that has arisen (literally, ‘the present need’) in order to help those who hear. If a brother has been doing something wrong he needs help. He doesn’t need tearing down, he needs building up.” When husbands and wives are honest, open and speak biblically, real communication occurs. The misunderstandings, irritations, sins and problems that occur in the marriage relationship are dealt with and eliminated daily, because couples are attacking problems—not each other.
 http://www.reformedonline.com/view/reformedonline/Biblical%20Principles%20for%20Solving%20Problems%20in%20the%20Home.htm